little tears

Littles feel pain. Sometimes it's easy to forget that. They play so well, laugh hard, are good at acting like they can't hear thing. Sometimes it's easy to forget that. That they get dragged into big people problems that aren't their fault. That there are pains and struggles they have to pretend don't exist when they come to school. Their lives have to continue, and often at the beat of someone else's drum. Some of these emotions are shiny and new, terrifying in their size and intensity. Their very presence creating a overwhelming paralysis. Augmenting the terror. 

Then they cry and are told they can't. They're told to use words they don't have. To express feelings they don't know exist. Is it a wonder then they turn to silence? That when they realize they can't be understood they pull away and stay within themselves? Because at least that's a constant. In this whirl of pain and confusion, at least they can trust themselves to not disappoint them. Even though that's perhaps the greatest lie of all. Because if they weren't a disappointment, wouldn't their mom have stayed? And then their teachers ask them why they cry. Of course they can't say it, because that confession will only make it more true. So the pain continues, and there's no one to let it out and tell them it'll be okay. 

Littles feel pain, and it's good for the bigs to remember. Because littles aren't spared big feelings. 

-Shayla